Hot Chocolate Drunk
by Satin Ragdoll
Summary: Spock gets drunk when he tries hot chocolate for the first time.


Hot Chocolate Drunk

by Satin Ragdoll

Uhura was relaxing in the rec-room when Captain Kirk breezed in with that sly, happy smile of his and strolled right up to her table.

"Hellooo, Uhura," he intoned, sounding almost musical.

Uh, oh. She tried to respond in the same spirit, "Yesss, Captain? What can I do for you?"

He cocked his head at her, "A little birdie told me you have gotten hold of some hot chocolate. The real stuff."

She grinned. Oho, so that was the game. "Not only the real stuff, but the goood stuff. Would you be liking some, Captain? I'm willing to share. I was planning on it, in fact."

He grinned back at her, "I would love some. Thank you very much."

oOo

Kirk was playing chess with Spock when Uhura came around with a little pot that was giving forth a very appealing fragrance. She gave him a cup and filled it up. He took a little sip. "Mmm. Mmmmm! You were right, Uhura, this _is _the good stuff! I think this might be the best hot chocolate I ever had. Thank you!"

"Ahem! Ahem! Ahem-hm!" Uhura turned around to see McCoy standing behind her, trying to look innocent.

She smiled at him sweetly, "Would you like a cup, Doctor McCoy?"

He raised his brows and pointed a finger at his own chest, "Who, me?" He grinned, "Sure, I would love a cup. It smells great."

She poured him a cup, and he took a sip. Rolling his eyes, he exclaimed, "Oh, God! Where did you get that? I haven't had hot chocolate this good in years!"

Uhura grinned at Bones slyly, "Now, now! A lady never tells." She turned her attention to Spock, "How about you, Mr. Spock? Would you like a cup of hot chocolate?"

Spock looked up from where he was regarding the chessboard. Kirk grinned at him, "You've got to try this!" Normally he wouldn't, but the smell coming from the pot was...intriguing.

"I do believe I will try a cup, Lieutenant. Thank you."

oOo

The beverage was thick, creamy and sweet, but not overly so. It had a rich, full flavor with a balancing amount of bitterness to the sweetness. Spock found that he liked the flavor.

When Uhura came back around, asking, "Who wants a refill?" Spock held out his cup.

The heat from the drink warmed Spock down to his center, and took the edge off of the discomfort of being aboard a ship that was always a little too cold.

He didn't notice when it began to take the edge off his mind.

oOo

Kirk won that chess game. He also won the next one. That _never _happened. Jim might win once, but then Spock always trounced him in the next round. The Captain watched his normally brilliant First Officer blink owlishly at the chessboard, and an awful suspicion began to dawn. Funny, hysterical even, but awful nonetheless.

When Spock left momentarily to use the head, McCoy quietly scanned him behind his back. Kirk's mouth dropped open when he saw the results. Suspicion confirmed. Spock was drunk. He was drunk on hot chocolate.

oOo

When Spock returned, he noticed Kirk's face was very red. Jim had his mouth hid behind his hand, trying very hard not to laugh, and failing miserably. But, why?

Spock was about to ask him when he noticed something was wrong. He believed he had been standing perpendicular, but the floor was in distinct imbalance to himself.

He looked over at Kirk, startled, "Captain! I believe something is wrong with the ship's gravitational system!"

Jim choked out, "No, Spock, that's just you. You're...listing."

Spock blinked, "I see. I will attempt to compensate." He slowly straightened until he was standing upright, then started to lean in the opposite direction.

Kirk lost it. Spock looked at him in genuine distress, "Captain, what is _wrong _with me?"

Jim made a monumental effort to control himself, "You're hot chocolate drunk, Spock. McCoy confirmed it."

oOo

Spock attempted to take a step forward and stumbled. Nurse Chapel at that moment chanced to walk in the door.

She took in the situation and sighed, "Oh, dear." Christine took his arm in an attempt to get him back to his seat, and Spock crumpled like a puppet with its strings cut.

He looked up at her. He was abashed, but he still had his Vulcan curiosity, "Fascinating. It appears I cannot stand upright."

McCoy helped her get him to his seat, while Kirk lost himself in laughter, again.

When Chapel tried to withdraw, Spock took her wrist, "You are a good woman, Christine. I am sorry I do not love you."

Christine spoke very softly in Vulcan, "_Kroykah! Ri aisha t'shal mesh." _It meant, "Stop! Do not cause yourself shame."

Spock blinked at her in confusion. The kind words were a contrast to the jumbled, angry, frustrated thoughts he had sensed from her. He realized she was trying to be tactful, despite her feelings. She was indeed a good woman. "Nemaiyo." It was a Vulcan "Thank you."

Christine extracted herself and left as quickly as possible. Jim just shook his head. Poor Christine.

oOo

McCoy sighed, "Alright, Spock. Let's get you to bed. Hot chocolate. Who would have thought?"

He got himself under Spock's shoulder and heaved. "Oof! You are so _heavy, _Spock! I'm a doctor, not a blasted body-builder! I hope I don't strain anything. Hobgoblin's got lead for bones."

Spock eyed him, still euphoric from the hot chocolate. "You appear to be unusually stressed, Doctor. I, however, am not. Perhaps..." and he reached for McCoy's face.

McCoy jerked and swatted Spock's hand away, "None of that, now! I don't need _both _of us drunk on hot chocolate! Who would take us to bed?"

Kirk piped up, "You know I would, Bones."

McCoy glared at him, "Says the man laughing his keester off. C'mon, Spock."

oOo

McCoy got Spock to bed, and got a mumbled, "Nemaiyo," before Spock conked out.

He couldn't blame Uhura, she hadn't known. None of them had.

He just knew that it was going to take a good bit of research to find what would fix the almost inevitable hang-over that Spock was going to have in the morning.

Fin.


End file.
